her story: I don’t have the abs I used to, but feel more confident and sexy than ever

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Hey guys! After sharing Laura and Alice’s stories, I have another awesome story for you about someone who went from binge eating every single day to never, ever having an urge to binge anymore. I remember when I was stuck in the diet / binge cycle for 10 years, I questioned whether or not I would ever get out of it. Today’s story is even more proof that it is possible to heal your relationship with food.

Kyla is here to share her incredible story with you. She used to feel that her worth came exclusively from the way she looked, and she had a really rough relationship with food. She felt totally helpless. After starting down the Intuitive Eating path, she stopped binge eating, found profound love for her body (WITHOUT the abs she used to have), and feels complete ease around food. I can’t wait for you to hear her wisdom.

Watch Kyla’s story here:

Interview Notes

1:00 Kyla shares her history with her struggle with food and binge eating

3:30 Why Kyla put so much stock in how she “looked on the outside”

5:00 We dive into Binge Eating — how it started for Kyla, what a “binge” really looked like for her, her relationship with peanut butter and cookies, and her shame around it all

9:30 How and why Kyla found the concept of “intuitive eating” and pursued it

12:00 Kyla’s first steps to becoming an intuitive eater — what worked specifically for her

12:40 Kyla shares one of her biggest binge eating triggers and how she got through it

14:15 How she learned how to handle her feelings that were coming up as she was trying to stop using food to “get rid of” her feelings

16:30 I asked Kyle about the “fear of gaining weight” that often comes up when people try intuitive eating

20:00 What life and food are like for Kyla today, and she also includes how long this process took her

23:30 How Kyla “chooses” to feel good in a bikini

26:30 Kyla’s biggest tips for YOU if you are where she was at the beginning of her journey

29:45 How to start handling food tomorrow if you want to stop dieting and becoming an intuitive eater. How to handle trigger foods (specifically, how Kyla handled her cookie butter trigger!)

33:00 How Kyla started paying more attention to “hunger and fullness”

Key Quotes

“I was binge eating almost every night. I hated my body and was exercising more than ever. On the outside, I looked healthy, but on the inside, I couldn’t stand the way I was eating, I was secretly binge eating every night and hated the way I looked.”

“I figured nobody would love me for who I was, so I thought I needed to look a certain way on the outside to get people to like me.”

“I was thinking about peanut butter all day, and how I wanted to eat half a jar in 5 minutes” (<–ps. how many of us can relate to this!!)

“I felt so much shame around it all, like I can’t believe I am secretly eating my roommate’s food.”

“I remember the night I signed up for the Intuitive Eating Challenge. I was eating my roommate’s ice cream and could not. stop. eating. I remember crying while putting in my credit card information.”

“I had spent SO much time ignoring my thoughts, feelings and what I wanted. I had to take time to start listening to what was coming up for me. I had to understand my triggers for binge eating.”

“I remember the first time I stopped eating when I was just comfortably full. I felt naked, like I was without my armor (ie. food).”

“I learned that if I feel sadness, that I am NOT sadness. I am just feeling it.”

“I really had to focus on what I wanted and what my body wanted, not what was going to make me the thinnest.”

“Today, I never ever get the urge to binge anymore. Which is so crazy to me. I used to fantasize about binge eating, and now I never do.”

“My life is guided by freedom and intuition instead of by fear.”

“I don’t have abs the way I used to, but I feel more confident and sexy in my body than I ever used to.”

“You never become Buddha one day. You’ll always have to deal with emotions and triggers. You just get to keep loving yourself and understanding yourself better.”

“It’s just your body. It’s not a reflection of who you are or ‘how great of a lifestyle you’re living’.”

 

Follow Ups:

  1. If you want to participate in the Intuitive Eating Challenge that she refers to, here it is. You can sign up and get started anytime.
  2. Follow Kyla here:
  3. Book Recommendations from Kyla:
    -Self Compassion by Kristin Neff
    -Daring Greatly by Brene Brown (or anything by her)
    -Reform Your Inner Mean Girl by Amy Ahlers and Christine Arylo
    -Hunger, Hope, and Healing by Sarahjoy Marsh
    -Women, Food, and God by Geneen Roth
    -And of course, the bible: Intuitive Eating by Resch & Tribole

Love,
Jamie

P.S. Have a story to share? I would love to hear! Please email me at jamie@jamiemendell.com.

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  1. Adrianne says:

    I loved this SO much! Thank you for these interviews! Hearing the thoughts of these women as they were going through the process brings things to the front of my mind that I didn’t realize I needed to work through. So, so helpful. Working through the whole “letting go of weight loss” concept, and these interviews came at the perfect time. When Kyla talked about deciding to have confidence in a bathing suit, that was gold. Keep up the amazing work, Jamie 🙂

    • Adrianne! So glad you liked the content 🙂
      & YES! Choosing confidence is so key. We’re always told that as soon as we weigh X amount, have this body or those arms or that booty, we’ll feel good about ourselves (which, as we know, is so not the case). But we have the choice to feel good about ourselves at any time- it’s never conditional!! xox
      Kyla

  2. Love these interviews Jamie. Could you do one with someone who struggles with food and is / was excessively over weight? Id love to hear how they handled their challenges and learned to love themselves.

  3. Yes, thank you SO MUCH for these videos!! Inspiring and very helpful information. I identified with Kyla in so many ways.

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