If We Were Having Coffee Right Now, I’d Tell You…

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One of my favorite food bloggers writes these heartfelt posts called Virtual Coffee Dates where she just talks about what’s going on in her life as if you were having coffee with her in a cute little cafe. I’ve always loved this concept and wish that I COULD have a coffee date with so many of you, so I decided to try out this concept today. Let me know if you like this post and I’ll try to work it in the rotation more often!

If we were having coffee today, I would tell you that life is crazy right now. For various reasons, I am in a place of uncertainty with different elements of my life (more to be disclosed soon) and let me tell you… I have learned that uncertainty is probably the hardest feeling for me to deal with. I binged and used food for years because of uncertainty – “I don’t like my job but I don’t know what else to do”, “why hasn’t he called me back”, etc.– and now that I no longer numb my feelings away with food, I’ve had to find other ways to handle it. I’m planning to write a longer post about dealing with uncertainty, but for now I would just tell you how much I’m letting myself feel it.

If we were having coffee today, I’d tell you how excited I am for the winter to end! I’ve never felt this sense of wanting to constantly hibernate as strong as I’ve felt it this winter. I check the 10 Day Forecast almost every day just waiting to see an upwards trend in the temperature indicating that we are somewhat close to spring.  Not quite there yet…

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I’d tell you that last week I challenged myself to eat at home for the entire week and ended up having a blast with it. I first looked up about 4 different recipes I wanted to cook, and then made a basic grocery list. It was so satisfying to spend one chunk of money at the grocery store at the beginning of the week and then not spend money on food again for that entire week. It felt kind of like a fun game and it forced me to get creative with food. Not to mention it was a big $$ saver!

Homemade Pizza:

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Random smoothie combos:

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Leftovers Party for Lunch:

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I’d tell you that my biggest struggle right now is loosening up in my relationship. I am by nature a very Type-A person, but I’m learning how being overly Type-A in my relationship can feel so overbearing and suffocating for my boyfriend. Thankfully he is the sweetest most patient man ever and gently shines a light on these parts of my personality without ever making me feel bad, but I’ve really taken it into my hands to take a hard look at these sides to me and have made a serious attempt to loosen up control, chill the f*ck out and give him space to do things his way and realize that my way isn’t always the best way. Big lessons here, but I am slowly, slowly learning.

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I would tell you that my Food Freedom Program finishes up next week and I just can’t believe that it’s over. This was my first official group program that I’ve ever run and I would tell you how different it was to coach women in a group setting vs. one-on-one. I would tell you about the immense amount of fear and self-doubt that I faced while selling the program and even starting the program, but how I’m proud of myself for pushing through it and doing my best to create something impactful.

I’d tell you about how I’ve been playing with the idea of making some of my posts a little “lighter” which is why you see this post and my past post about muffins. I’d explain that the work that I do with emotional eating and body image is so profoundly deep and intense -and I LOVE  that- but I also really like talking about food, cooking, nutrition and life in a lighter sense. After I put some more thought into this, I’m going to be reaching out to you for some help to tell me what you’re looking for, what your biggest struggles are right now, and what else I can do to support you.

If we were having coffee together today, what would you talk about? Did you like this kind of post and would you want to see more of this? Please let me know in the comments below. 

Love,
Jamie

 

 

 

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26 thoughts on “If We Were Having Coffee Right Now, I’d Tell You…

  1. I loved this post :) It’s easier to apply great advice from someone you feel you know (even if just a little). I felt like I was in a conversation with you, and that was nice! If we were having coffee together, I would tell you that I just had the anniversary of the most painful year of my life. It was a time to slow down and process all my family has been through, and that was rough to really feel. But, it also makes me feel proud that we made it. My body took a hit weight-wise, but the anniversary felt like a starting line to the year where we heal. I want to use intuitive eating to get back where I should be, since that’s the only way I’ve ever been able to be at the weight that is right for me, and I look forward to reading more of your posts for encouragement and to remind myself to be patient :) Patience is my weakness, which is why diets are so alluring sometimes. I’d also tell you that I agree– uncertainty is SO difficult! The big thing we learned this year is that you only have right now. We can become certain about things and make our plans, but we have no real guarantee of anything but right now. Enjoy it and be present and thankful :) Thanks for your blog!

    1. Adrianne, Thank you so much for sharing. It sounds like a lot went on with your family this year and I commend you for taking time to reflect and truly feel all of the feelings that came along with it – that takes so much strength. I love your advice about dealing with uncertainty – thank you so much for that. And yes, eating intuitively takes patience but I know you’ll get there. Please stay in touch and let me know how things are going for you :) xoxo.

  2. Still struggling with emotional eating especially this time of year when you would rather stay in bed then face the cold temperatures . I try to combat this by working out regularly but the evenings are my hardest time to not go on the emotional eating rollercoaster. Any suggestions as to how to get through this… ?

    1. Hey Susan — this is SO normal, especially this time of year. My suggestion is to start thinking about what the food is doing for you in the evenings… is it helping with boredom? is it helping you relax? is it something comforting at the end of the day? Once you figure out what the food is giving you, try to find other ways to get that. So for instance if you’re eating out of boredom, how can you plan to have really fun and exciting evenings — start a creative project, get together with friends, watch a movie you’re really excited about, cook a delicious meal, etc. Let me know what you think!

  3. Hi! I’ve never read your blog before but the teaser on instagram got me here. Loved the post. I appreciate the honesty and warmth that comes across your post . There is too much pressure in being perfect, reaching certain goal by certain age and so and so. Thanks for the raw truth. I’ve been dealing with uncertainty since 2014 started and it eats me inside if I let it. I feel like I should have my stuff together at 30 and I don’t. But I would also add that even when it gets hard, I find little things that make my day a good one. So I celebrate the little victories everyday with my morning coffee. And that’s what we would talk about if we were having coffee today. Hope winter ends soon for you!

    1. Caroline, I am so happy that you came here and commented. I love how you find the good during an uncertain time — my boyfriend and I have also started saying three things we are grateful for each night before we go to sleep. It’s so nice to make a point to focus on these aspects of our lives instead of everything that isn’t “together” and “figured out” (<— is everything EVER really totally figured out anyway??). Thanks so much for your comment. xoxo.

  4. I love these kinds of posts and would love to see more of them along with lighter posts. I think a balance of intense and lighter posts is great. If we were having coffee I’d tell you I’m so over winter too. I just got back from Florida and it was a much needed escape to the sun!

  5. So great to hear from you again– missed your posts!! Love the idea of the virtual coffee date. What you said about learning to be less type-A in your relationship really resonated with me, as this is something I’ve been struggling with for awhile. My fiance is the complete opposite and while we usually balance each other out really nicely, I often have to give myself gentle reminders to relax a little, let go of control, and not plan out every.little.detail of our life. It’s a work in progress, like everything else, but I think realizing that I have those tendencies is the first step in creating a change!

    1. Becca… same with my BF and I… we have very different personalities in this regard. It’s definitely a slow work in progress but what I’ve found helpful is asking myself what I’m scared of if I don’t plan everything / control things. Disappointment? Him not getting things done? There’s usually something there and it’s helpful to at least be aware. This is definitely a toughie though!!! xoxo.

  6. Hi Jamie! I love this post and the idea of it. It brings a nice tangible and visual quality to a post, this idea of having coffee together. Love it! I love how vulnerable and real you are with the world and that’s something I’m working on. I also wanted to say that I am truly grateful for having found you and your Food Freedom program and how awesome you are at this. You truly have a gift and am so happy that you found it.

    1. Hey Sarah, thank you SO much for your kind words. I am SO happy that we have had the chance to get to know one another. You are truly a VERY beautiful woman, inside and out! :) <— so cliche but so true! xoxox.

  7. Jamie, I LOVED LOVED LOVED this post! I love how honest and candid it was, how real it was and how personal it felt like an actual coffee date!

    I can’t wait to read your post about uncertainty as I personally and have been in this place recently and am still trying to work through this also so I’d love to hear your take on it!

    And thank you for sharing your life journey, totally relate with the type A issues and it’s not easy to change those ways – another one I’m still trying to figure out – I commend you for all of it!

    1. Thanks, Sara. I’m so glad you liked the post and yes — the post on uncertainty will come out soon once I feel ready to write it :) Hope everything is going well for you! xoxo.

  8. Jamie,
    This is the best post ever!!! It’s so personal and honest and intimate. I really feel like we’re sitting at a little, round cafe table, cradling over sized cups of something warm and satisfying and talking like only girls can do with one another.
    Thanks for the chat :)
    Karen

  9. Jamie, I agree with the girls – I loved the post! Coffee-chats are my favorite ones, so…keep ‘em coming! ;)
    Also, one of your first phrases, about uncertainty, really got me thinking…and I could sooo identify myself with it! Uncertainty comes with fear, and fear stops me from doing what I want which leads to dissatisfaction and binging, not happiness. That is why I want to share with you a small thought I recently bumped into (one of those FB/Instagram motivation phrases I sometimes like reading :) ). It’s long one but I want to share this part: “…and she replaced the fear of unknown with curiosity…” :) I’m making it my new motto ;)

    Enjoy your weekend!
    Ivana

    1. Ivana… I LOVE that! Thank you so so much. I am definitely going to use that during these times!! Thank you so much for sharing. xoxo.

  10. Hi Jamie,
    I really enjoyed this post. I particularly enjoyed your cooking at home for nights in a row. Must do this more and bring the joy back to being in the kitchen. Dealing with uncertainty is one of the hardest parts of life. I am starting to think of it as an opportunity for the “Ultimate plan” to be better than I could ever plan. Taking it day by day can be hard so sometimes I just think of it minute by minute. Keep these posts coming Jamie! XO

    1. Hey Gia, I also try to think of the “ultimate plan” and that things will work out as they should… and you’re right that thinking of it minute by minute is so necessary because it’s easy to jump 15 steps ahead and start getting anxious. Thanks for sharing and I hope you’re doing well. xoxo.

  11. Jamie, I don’t think you’ll find this surprising….I believe this is my first “blog” ever!

    I’ve missed you! The coffee chat was refreshing on this cold, snow covered morning here in IN! I too am more than ready for spring!

    I would tell you this morning, over coffee, that I am in a much better place of clarity than I was one year ago. I did not realize the density of the forest until I started stepping out, again!

    You are a kindred soul….I wish you well…always!
    Smiles,
    Kathy

    1. Hi Kathy, it’s so good to hear from you! I am SO happy that you’re in a place of clarity (or moreso) now than a year ago. I miss our chats and am so thankful that we can at least connect via virtual coffee dates :) Keep in touch! xoxo.

  12. I love this post – your candidness is refreshing. Thank you so much for offering your 21 day program too. Today is Day One for me and I must admit that I’m a little afraid and a lot ready :-)

    Honestly, I don’t think about how hard my life is. I told my beau the other day that I must make it look really easy because people think I have my crap together. I truly don’t. I’m a 30-something single mom to a 10 year old boy. I work a 9 to 5 job in a cubicle. I only see the sunshine on weekends. My beau is going through paramedic school right now, so I don’t see him that often. I don’t see my life as stressful – it just is and I do what needs to be done. But I think because I view it that way, I eat my emotions surrounding my stress.

    Thank you for this post – I think you’ve surreptitiously opened up the floodgates. I think I’ll be journalng a lot in the next three weeks :-)

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